
Vice
Sonny Justice was calm in his Ferrari, parked across the street from the hottest video store in town. It was almost time to move in.
Bathed in the blue light from the neon sign, Sonny gave his partner, Tubbs Purebottom, the nod. Tubbs didn’t answer right away. Sonny understood. He’d been in a flashback once or twice himself. He knew how it went.
In the office, months ago, Tubbs was talking to the new rookie, Carlotta, who was only twenty three. “Why is some stupid show that’s older than me so important to you guys?” Carlotta asked as Sonny chuckled to himself. “Who cares about owning the Complete Series of Miami Vice on DVD?”
Tubbs was so shocked at what she said, shocked that there was a whole generation that did not yet understand the importance of all five seasons of Miami Vice, that at first, he didn’t know just what to say. But he knew one thing about this feisty rookie: he was completely in love.
Sonny Justice understood what was going on in his partner’s head. All good cops had a flashback once in a while. It was part of the drama. Rookies, they just went after the case. They didn’t understand the style, the cars, the loafers with no socks. Rookies just didn’t understand how a 27 DVD set could be so vital to American popular culture. But Tubbs knew. And Sonny knew that he knew. That night the Columbians had left a bomb on Sonny’s boat and killed his pet crocodile, Tubbs had stopped in with a pizza and that really great first season episode with the ATF agent named Evan. Or the night Sonny’s wife had left him because she couldn’t handle the life of being the wife of a cop, Tubbs came right over, and the two men had a few beers and watched that really cool fourth season episode with Brian Dennehy as a post-modern televangelist, and it was all okay for a little while. Maybe Tubbs was even thinking about that night right now. Or maybe he was just thinking about-
”-Carlotta!” Tubbs exclaimed. “I know you’re young, but listen. Listen to me. Did you know that Dick Wolf from Law and Order cut his teeth working on Miami Vice? And did you know that the guy in charge of Battlestar Galactica, Edward James Olmos himself, played Lieutenant Castillo, head of the Miami Vice team? And did you know that there’d be no Grand Theft Auto: Vice City without this show? Think of how different the world would be without the ground-breaking phenomenon that was the Complete Series of Miami Vice!”
At the time, Tubbs Purebottom didn’t know if he’d gotten through to her, but now, he was sure that he had. Because while he was flashbacking, Sonny Justice had made the collar. And his suspect was… Carlotta. Her hair was loose, her dress pastel. She wore leg warmers, and her eyes were wild and desperate. She was clutching the Miami Vice Complete Collection DVD set to her chest. And, just like the anonymous tip had promised… they were three weeks overdue.
“Can’t… can’t I just watch them again? Officer? Can’t I… just watch one season again?” Carlotta stared blankly at Tubbs Purebottom. Tubbs stared back. She didn’t even recognize him. She was too far gone.
“You can’t blame yourself, pal,” said Sonny, pushing the tearful Carlotta down on the hood. “All you did was recommend a TV show. She made her own decision. It’s not your fault. You hear me, buddy? It’s not your fault.” Tubbs nodded back to his partner, but didn’t say a word. He was lost in his thoughts once more.
“Oh, Officer Purebottom,” Carlotta was saying. I didn’t become a cop to watch television. And besides, I probably won’t even watch the pilot.” Tubbs leaned across to Carlotta’s side of the bed and placed the remote in her hand.
“Go on, baby,” Tubbs whispered. “Just watch one episode and you’ll be hooked for life. You’ll see. It’s like a guilty pleasure. Miami Vice is such an addictive show.”
Carlotta sighed. “Okay, Tubbs Purebottom. I’ll try it. For you. Okay? Just because I love you.”
“I love you too, Carlotta,” Tubbs whispered back as the squad car drove away in slow motion. “I love you too.”
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